Few things in this world will shake a woman’s confidence like being cheated upon. But what happens when your husband prefers another man? Over twenty years ago, during my first marriage I found out just how devastating that betrayal can be.
I was due to give birth to our second child in weeks. We were hoping for a little girl to go with our son. I will admit our marriage was far from perfect. My husband suffered from debilitating depression that had marked our two year marriage with troubles. But nothing prepared me for the words he spoke that Sunday morning.
He began with the all too common words, ‘I have something I need to tell you.’
Why is it that those words are never followed by anything good? We won the lottery. I got a new job. We bought a new house. Anything good. But no, what comes next is always something horribly dreadful. This time was no different as he opened his mouth and poured forth his tawdry story.
He had been unfaithful. It was just once while I had taken our son back east on holiday. He was terribly, terribly sorry and the guilt was eating him up. He loved us and wanted our marriage beşiktaş escort to work. He felt he had to tell me the truth so we could begin a new before the baby was born.
I remember feeling as if he had physically hit me. How could he do this when he knew that I was carrying his child? I was only gone a couple of weeks. His weak ass could not do without pussy for even that long? But what he said next poleaxe me.
‘It was BJ from work.’
BJ was our friend; our male friend. He worked part-time in the office with my husband. He spent more nights than not at our house drinking beers and watching television with us. Sure, he was openly gay, but we were liberal. It did not bother us. We even had him watch our son once or twice while we went out to dinner or the movies.
I wish I could say that I did not remember anything else he said that morning, but the truth is that over the weeks and months afterwards I imagined every last detail that he described.
They had been watching television and drinking beer like all the other nights. He blamed that for beşyol escort what happened next. BJ had told him that he wanted to suck his cock. At first he said he had resisted, but he finally gave in. According to him, he had not done anything.
If not doing anything means allowing another man to open your pants and pull out your cock. If not doing anything means having your cock fill with rushing blood as another man wraps his lips around it and licks and sucks it. If not doing anything mean having your hot cum erupt down that man’s throat in the end. Yeah, he had done nothing.
Those days were horrible. I mean I was young and relatively pretty. Yes, my belly was rounded by our child that grew within, but I was still attractive. Just a couple of weeks before a car full of men had whistled at me. Of course, that was from behind and they had looked quite shocked when they had passed me and noticed my full belly. But not all men were turned off by that. Another of our friends, one of the hottest black men I had ever seen, had propositioned me and tried to seduce me just weeks beykent escort before my trip. I had refused, of course. I was married and we were having a new baby.
Hell, I had supported our son and his sorry ass for over a year as a stripper while he sat at home paralysed with depression. During those times, I had also had to do all the cooking and cleaning. I even had to pay my hard earned money to a babysitter, because the one time I left our son with him he had gone downstairs to our neighbours. Our son had fallen down a flight of stairs. Thank goodness he only had a nasty pump to show for it. But it would be a very long time before I could again entrust him with our son.
How could he do this to me? I did not deserve it. Had he thought about HIV? What if BJ gave him AIDS? He could have infected both me and the new baby already. Worst of all, how do you compete when the other woman is another man? If he had cheated with a woman, then I felt that I could compete. I could lose weight. I could dye my hair. I could get my boobs enlarged. Whatever he saw in her that I lacked, I could fix. But I could not grow a penis.
Our marriage lasted another ten years and to my knowledge he never cheated again with a man or a woman. But then again, he found Jesus. My family had always thought he was gay and perhaps he is. But what I do know is that being cheated on sucks; especially when you do not have the right equipment to even compete.